Learn Australian English in this vlog episode of Aussie English where I head to the Collector Pumpkin Festival and experience some Australian culture and food, as well as get to check out Australia’s biggest pumpkin!
Watch this episode here!
AE 444 – Vlog: Australia’s Biggest Pumpkin
Hit the road, Jack, and don’t you come back…
What’s up, guys? Welcome to this episode of Aussie English. Today is going to be a…. Today is going to be a really good episode. The glasses just went under my seat and I’ll have to find them later. We have stocked up on stuff. So, we got some drinks here. What else have we got Kel? We got some… We got nuts and fruit, and nuts and fresh, healthy snacks for the road. So, we are about to hit the road and where are we going, Kel? We’re going a pumpkin festival. Pumpkins! Alright, let’s go.
Alright, so food and drink in hands, we hit the road. It was about 40 minutes or so along the highway up north until we got to Collector, and then we were faced with this.
So, initially I was like, “Okay, what’s going on? Is the police checking people or something before they get there? But no, it was just that the road was blocked like crazy. People were parking on the sides of the roads here and then walking in, and initially, I was thinking, “Okay maybe we can do that, you know? Maybe we’ll just park wherever we can find a park and walk in.”. But I thought, “I’ll stay in the car, we’ll keep driving and see what happens.”. My God! We were in the car for about 40 minutes driving along a road that was probably a kilometre long. I shit you guys not. It took forever. It was crazy.
Alright, guys, so we are here in collector and Jesus Christ. What is this? This is crazy. So crazy, guys.
Jesus! We’re finally here you, guys. What an ordeal. I think we spent more time on the road driving about 500 metres than we did getting leave from Canberra to here. So, here we are. Let’s go see what it’s about.
So, it was pretty cute. There are loads of people, already leaving though. It was about lunchtime and there was a heap of people leaving. I thought, “Oh, it’ll be slow. There won’t be that many people”, but there was still a shit ton of people. So, here you can see the the gates. We had to pay about 10 bucks a person, I think, 10 bucks a head to get in. We could obviously pay with cash on the left side and if EFTPOS on the right side. So, that is using your, I guess, just using your bank card, right? So, you use the EFTPOS machine, which is that little machine they used to do the transaction. And this chick was having a bit of trouble with the machine as we went through. And something interesting you might not know about, in Australia we have Pay Pass, we call it, where you can just touch the card on to the machine and it senses the microchip in the card and the transaction goes through. So, if it’s an order or some kind of payment under 100 dollars, you can do that and you don’t have to enter any pin or anything like that.
So, we got in it and man it was hot, and I forgot my god damn hat! This is what happens when you forget your hat, guys. I’ve got to stand in line for ages. I’ve got to pee, gotta pee, gotta pee, gotta pee! If you guys have ever wondered what the inside of portaloo looks like, a portatoilet, here you go. This is it. Check this out. Don’t drop the phone!
If you guys have already seen the movie Kenny, you definitely need to check out that movie. It’s great. And it’s all about portaloos, so outhouses. What else? The brick shithouses. Although, these ones are plastic. Portaloos, we call them. Portaloos. But, yeah, check out the film if you haven’t. There should be a picture here showing you.
So, obviously being a pumpkin fate or fair there were pumpkins everywhere the I could see for sale. There were stores selling pumpkins. There were pumpkins on the ground holding things down, weighting down signs, they were all over the place. You could eat them. We went in to a…, I guess, it’s the town hall, some kind of building where you could see all of these pumpkin dishes that were being, I guess, assessed and voted on. You could see this crazy pumpkin cakes and carved pumpkins as well. There was one there that was huge that was number one that looked like a jack-o’-lantern from Halloween. And then, there were the smallest pumpkins awards, I guess, for those as well. So, they were pretty cute.
So, we made our way out, walked around a little bit, and I stumbled upon the largest pumpkin, and this thing was huge! I think I could have crawled up inside of this, had it been hollow. It was massive, guys. I don’t think I could have lifted it. It was absolutely huge. And I would love to know how long that took to grow. Far out! And what steroids were they giving it? Huge! Huge!
So, we kept going, kept having a look, and then we stumbled upon what looked like sheep in a paddock. I was like, “Something interesting’s going on here.”. And this guy was talking about herding sheep using cattle dogs, using these Kelpies, these two black and white Kelpies in the background.
So, we were walking around checking out these different stalls, all kinds of leather products, there were clothes, and then we found a whole heap of picture frames, hippie clothing, candles, different aroma things, all sorts of soaps, heaps and heaps of stuff. This is the kind of stuff you’ll see at these markets, these farmer’s markets.
And then, we came across the food stalls and this is where things started to get pretty good, guys. So, I was getting pretty hungry by this point and decided that it was time to get something to eat and we were also pretty thirsty. And so, what’s really common at these fetes and at pretty much any public event, you’re going to see things that are like hot food stands. So, you’re going to see hot dogs, which is like a sausage in a bun, you know? It’s a pretty American thing, but it’s popular here too. You’ll see all kinds of meat. This one also had hot chips. That’s a really common thing to find that these stalls where you get chips with sauce and salt on them in little buckets, kind of like coffee mugs, or coffee cups, the cardboard coffee cups but bigger. You get those. And then there were battered savs!
Alright, guys. So, I thought I had to do some food for you in this vlog. This is a battered sav. So, this is a sausage in batter that’s been deep fried, and then it’s been dipped in it’s sauce, tomato sauce of course. And, wow. It’s pretty good as you would imagine any dried… deep* fried food is. So, I’m going to hand this over to Kel and give her a bit of a go.
Enjoying Aussie English?
Support AE on Patreon today so I can bring you even better content!
Yeah cheers. Cheers, Kel! Kel! What did you…? What did you…? There’s nothing left! What did you do? You smashed it! This is so unfair, guys. We might have to get another one.
So, I thought there was this scarecrow in the middle here, and then I looked sideways, and I was like, “This crowd’s pretty thick.”, and all of a sudden, I realized they’re all on sticks, and these people standing up are all scarecrows as well. These are… They’re not people. They’re all scarecrows. I had no idea. I thought it was just a really thick crowd.
So, this is how multicultural Australia gets, guys. We out in the middle of, you know, woop woop in a town called Collector and we have here German hot dogs, Turkish Gozleme, we’ve got Tian Farm chicken food. What else have we got? Some authentic organically grown… Dunno whats, and then the French crepes as well. So, there’s stuff from all over the world in this tiny little fete/fair thing. Crazy! where’s the Brazilian food, Kel? I’m still looking for it.
I was thinking this was some African country or something, guys, like Uganda. And then I got it. “Uwana”, “(Do) you want a coffee?”. Ok, I get it. I get it.
We also stumbled upon some guy doing a kid’s show. He was playing this pipe like the didgeridoo and singing about native Australian animals, which was pretty cute.
Skip like a kangaroo.
Skipping around Kakadu.
Little joey in the pouch.
Two ears sticking out.
And then after that, we stumbled upon some old carriages that were drawn by horses.
And it looks like we got some really old good carriages out the back here, guys. So, people getting rides on those. Let’s have a look and see if we can see one go past.
And I don’t know whether or not this was paid, but you could jump on these things and they would take you for a ride around this paddock or this oval, it could have been a cricket field, but it looks really cool. So, I sat there and watched them come round.
A common scene at all fairs, guys. The dunny queue.
What do you think, guys? Is this pretty “punny”. Instead of “bandicoot”, “bandicute”.
We kept walking around after that looking at different stalls and Kel found a really cute store where you could buy baby’s clothing called “Bandicute”. Pretty funny pun. So, we grabbed something there from my niece. That was pretty cool, except for the fact that Kell’s card didn’t work so I ended up having to pay for that one. Thanks, Kel.
But, yeah, there were all kinds of bookstalls. There were stores selling Australian stuffed animals. There were stores selling signs made out of Australian animals. Then there were bracelets and jewellery, plants, you could get succulents and cacti, and even, I think, some carnivorous plants, right? So, things like the picture plants and the Venus fly traps, which I found pretty interesting. Wasn’t expecting to see that.
And then of course the ice cream truck or the ice cream van. Now, this is a very common sight in Australia.
Another really famous thing to say goes here when you come to these fairs is the ice cream truck, usually with a big, big line in front of it. So, there you go. Although, I’m not going have any ice. Not today.
It’s not just me that says it, guys. When things go wrong!
It wouldn’t be a fete, guys, without a sausage sizzle and the sauce hiding in. Some bread, sausage, and there you go.
We also ended up hearing some bagpipes being played in the background, which was pretty random, and there was a group of maybe 15 or so people standing in a circle in one of these pavilions just playing these bagpipes incredibly loudly. So, went and had a look at that.
And then, we were pretty much done for the day. We’d been there for a few hours. We were pretty wrecked, had eaten a little bit, walked around.
Alright, guys, I think we’re a faired out, smashed it out, managed to only eat a little bit of dirty food, and didn’t break the bank, although Kel did trick me. She got me. Oh my god! So, we ended up buying something from my niece.
So, I think we’re going home now. Pretty wrecked, pretty wrecked. Lots of sun exposure. I got my vitamin D for the day. I tell you what!
And another thing, I guess, that was kind of interesting was that there were two of these graveyards on either side of the main street as we walked out of this fair, and this you’ll see a lot in Australian towns, especially small towns that are quite old. You’ll see that churches quite often have graveyards next to them.
And of course as soon as we got out we needed coffee. So, we went to Some Café, and the café at the intersection there.
As always, guys, we’ve got to do a pit stop and get some coffee.
And sat around, got some coffee, and also tried some delicious treats here. So, I think that we grab some carrot cake here. That was delicious. And yeah, I just can’t get enough of the carrot cake.
And then it was time to head home. So, we got in the car. We got out pretty quickly, fortunately. It wasn’t to block, but then we hit traffic, and we were like, “Okay, what the hell is going on? Why is the highway where we should usually be driving at about 110 Ks an hour, why are we moving out like five kays an hour?”. So, we sat there for ages and then the GPS told us that had been an accident up ahead, interestingly enough. And so, we were waiting for ages, like four or five kilometres of just heaps of people heading back to Canberra.
Man, I can’t believe this shit! We get back on the highway were meant to be doing 110, and how fast are we going Kel? That’s 10 kilometres. 100 kilometers to slow. So, there’s been some accident, apparently, up here, but it feels like we got to Collector earlier on and we were going the same speed for about 20 minutes trying to get to the town to park and now we’re just trying to get home. We’re doing the same shit again. God damn it! Hopefully everyone’s okay in the accident, but far out!
And I was expecting to see some epic carnage when we got there, but it had all been taken away. And so, we just passed a few cop cars and the firies, and that was about it. Then we headed home.
Good thing on the way home though, I thought “Another excuse to do some photography”. We passed these horses in a field near a horse club of some kind or some place where some person obviously takes care of people’s horses on their land. So, these fields were full of about 20 horses, and we got out of the car, and they all came over to us. It was beautiful, and Kel got to do some photography whilst the sun was setting with these horses in the background.
Alright, guys. That is it for me today. I hope you enjoy this vlog. Let me know, do you guys like pumpkins? Comment below and don’t forget to hit the subscribe button and the bell icon if you would like to keep up to date with all the latest videos. I hope you have an amazing night, guys, and I’ll see you in the next one. Peace!
Watch More Vlogs Here!